The long and difficult way of love
by Moonys
Summary: COMPLETE! AU! Fem!Harry/Remus Rose is in love with Remus since her third year, but he would never feel the same, right? If she would only knew she's his mate. Full Summary inside!
1. Back at 12 Grimmauld Place

**Summary**: Rose is spending her holidays at #12 Grimmauld Place, together with Sirius and her long-time-crush Remus. Deeply in love with the werewolf, she has to learn what it means when he seems to be in love, with someone else. But why are Sirius and Remus acting so strange in her presence?

**Titel: **The long and difficult way of love  
><strong>Author<strong>: Moonys  
><strong>Rated:<strong> T for language  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> Rose/Remus, mention James/Lily, Tonks/Remus one-sided  
><strong>Warning: <strong>AU! Fem!Harry, Don't like, don't read!  
><strong>Notes: <strong>none  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong>I don't own Harry Potter.

English is not my native language. I write FanFictions in English because I love the language and to improve my skills.

* * *

><p>It was the summer before her 6th year at Hogwarts. Rose Potter had to spend the first two weeks of the summer holidays with her relatives, to keep the bloodwards up.<p>

It wasn't a secret that she hated her relatives, like they hated her. Sometimes she wonder, how it was possible that her Aunt Petunia was her mother's sister.  
>Another thing to wonder about was how anyone, even Petunia, could marry a git like Uncle Vernon. Although, together they made a perfect couple. They have created their own perfect little world, or better said utterly normal world. Totally boring. Totally normal. And Rose was totally misplaced there. She was a witch, and even for a witch anything but normal.<p>

But only one more day, and she would be back at number 12 Grimmauld Place, and could spend the rest of the holidays with her godfather, Remus and later with her friends.  
>She laid on the bed. Tired from all the chores she had to do today. Her Uncle knew she'll leave tomorrow. First he was happy their get rid of the freak so early this year, but that meant that he had to do all the annoying stuff like lawnmowing, window cleaning etc. So he gave his niece a big list of chores she had to do, before she was allow to leave. Another annoying think was, that other freaks has to show up to get her. The Dursleys hoped the neighbors wouldn't see any of them.<p>

Tomorrow at about 12 p.m. She would be on the way to Grimmauld Place. Remus and Mad-Eye would come and get her. She giggled by the imagination of what her Uncle would say about Mad-Eye. (A/N: Because Sirius survived the BoM in my story, there were no need to warn the Dursleys, and so they never met Mad-Eye before.)  
>And what would he say about Remus. She frowned. It wasn't like she mind what her Uncle say or think about anything or anyone, but she couldn't stand the thought of someone insulting Remus. She knew what he would say about his old and somewhat shabby robes.<p>

She sigh heavily, roll on her stomach, and looked at the picture of her parents.

_What would you say? Would you mind? Would you hate me for my feelings? Or would you be simply disgusted? But I love him, you know. I can't help it. I would change it if I could. I tried. But it doesn't worked. On the other hand... anything would be different if you were still alive. Maybe... maybe I wouldn't even love him like that..._

That was her last thought, before she closed her eyes and fell in a dreamless sleep.

* * *

><p>It was half past eleven when the doorbell rang. Rose ran down the stairs before her Uncle could open the door. Too late.<p>

"Hello Dursley." Mad-Eye growled before Vernon could say a word. He was wearing a hat which he lifted a bit now, so that Vernon saw why he got this nickname.  
>Vernon paled. He swallowed audibly and croaked: "Come in."<br>Mad-Eye smiled mischivious and even Remus smirked.

"Hello Potter." Mad-Eyed said when he saw Rose on the top of the stairs. Remus turned around. "Hello Rose." he said and smiled brightly. "I hope you don't mind that we're a little early."

"No, it's totally okay. I'm almost done with packing, anyway." she said and smiled back at him. "I just fetch my trunk..." she said exited and went back to her room.

She threw the last of her stuff carelessly into the trunk and jumped when she suddely heard a voice behind her.

"Wait. I help you with the trunk." it was Remus.

Rose's cheeks turned slightly pink. "Thanks." she said softly.

"How are your holidays so far?" he asked while closing her trunk.

"Well... let's say I'm just happy to get out of here." she answered.

"Then let's go." Remus said and carried the trunk downstairs.

"So, you're ready?" Mad-Eye asked. "Your relatives are not exactly talkative."

The Durselys stand in the corner of the kitchen, holding each other tightly. Petunia and Dudley looked at Mad-Eye like he's a mad-man who will kill them every moment. Vernon looked simply pissed what made the view much more funny as it already was.  
>Rose laughed and Remus whispred amused: "I should have known..."<p>

"Oh, how will we travel?" she asked.

"With a portkey." Remus said, knewing she didn't like portkeys since her forth year, he quickly added: "I'm sorry, but it's the savest way to get you to the headquarters."

"Okay..." Rose sighed and went to the door, right behind Moody.

"Um... don't you want to say goodbye to your Aunt and Uncle?" Remus asked a bit cunfused.

Rose raised her hand lazyly and murmeld a "Bye." without looking at them. Remus frowned but didn't say anything.

The three walked to the end of the street, and therefore out of the protection area. Remus pulled a empty waterbottle out of his robes. The portkey.  
>Rose and mad-Eye grabbed it and felt almost immadently an uncomfortable pull near her navel. Within only a second they arrived at number 12 Grimmauld Place. Rose fell on the floor, Remus and Mad-Eye landed next to her on their feets.<p>

"Another reason I hate traveling by portkey." she murmled. Remus kneel next to her and put a hand on her back and took her hand to help her up. The girl blushed immadently and hoped Remus would think she's ashamed of her clumsiness and not because she felt a comfortable tingle in her stomach.

"It's alright. Everyone has problems with traveling by portkey the first times." the werewold said.

Rose cheeks turned even redder. "Thanks" she whispered to him when she stand on her feet again. She looked at him and smiled shyly.

"Was that what I thought it was?" she heard her godfather's voice from the next room.

Remus smiled brightly. "You know, Sirius annoyed the whole Order with the question when we finally bring you here. He really missed you."

Rose laughed of the mental image how Sirius annoyed everyone like a little child who wants a lolly, and felt how her heart warming from the thought he missed her. Sirius was the first person who was kind of like a parent for her. Like a father she never had, or a big brother. She knew that Sirius loved to spend time with her, not because she was something special to the wizard-world, no, just because she was his godchild. It made her feel wanted and loved. A feeling no one ever gave her before.

"Yep, it is." Sirius said when he heard Rose laughing. Suddenly a big black dog rushed though the door, straight to Rose.

"Sirius! NO!" she said before Padfoot ran into her, knocked her down, and kicked her face.

"I've told you, he missed you." Remus laughed.

"You didn't said he missed me THAT much." Rose also laughing and trying to push the monster of dog off of her chest.

* * *

><p>It was only a week later, two days before her 16th birthday, when Rose became upset. Something was going wrong here. She noticed how Sirius and Remus whispered secretly behind her back, or stopped talking immadently when Rose entered the room. It was simply annoying and she didn't knew what she should think about it.<p>

They were Ordermember, so they maybe just speak about further plans. Or they speak about her. But what would they talk about her, what they couldn't tell her directly? So maybe it's really only about the Order. Or they talked about her birthday. She sighed. Whatever it is, she hoped one day, and that day should be pretty soon, they would tell her.

"Hey. What are you reading?" Remus entered the living room and sat next to Rose.

"Same as yesterday." she answered and smiled.

She loved spening time with Remus. Sirius company was fun, too, but it was something else with Remus.  
>Almost every day she would sit with him for hours in the living room or library and talked about anything and everything. Sometimes Sirius would join them, and they talked about the Marauders time at Hogwarts. Rose had finally the chance to asked all the things she wanted to know about her parents; sometimes simple things like what their favorite color were, or which subject their liked the most. It was wonderful.<br>All the more she wondered about they strange behaviour sometimes.

The worst day so far, was her 16th birthday itself. She was allowed to stay awake until midnight.

"Exited?" Sirius asked and smirked.

"Well... Donnu. It's just my birthday... nothing special." she answered shyly.

"Nothing special, she said. It's your sixteenth birthday! It IS something special." Sirius said and hugged her.

She didn't care. Something was wrong. Very wrong. She couldn't exactly say what it was, but she felt it. Sirius was overjoied and she didn't know why. Okay, Sirius liked to be overjoined when something special was happen but he was never to hyper before. It couldn't be only her birthday. And there were Remus. He seems to be nervous all day and a bit distant.

"One more minute to go." the werewolf said and looked at clock like it would explode every second. His forhead was sweaty, and he rubs the palmes of his hand nervously.

"Merlin's beard, Remus." Sirius laughed. "Relax." and winked his old school friend.

Remus didn't said anything but looked at him like he was about to eat him alive.

"3...2...1... Happy birthday, my favorite Godchild!" Sirius said and hugged her tightly.

"Sirius... I'm your only godchild." she laughed.

"And my favorite." he said and kissed her temple.

She turned around to Remus. He was looking at her with a odd expression. Only a second before he hugged her, she saw something in his eyes, she never saw before, although she couldn't say what it was, but it scared her.

"Happy birthday, Rose." he whispered in her ears with a strange husky voice.

"Thank you." she said and felt how he was shivering in her arms, before he pulled abruptly out of her arms.

They were looking at each other, but Remus soon dropped the gaze.

"So, you're allowed to open one present now. The rest has to wait until tomorrow morning." Sirius said.

"Um..." Rose looked at the pile of presents. "I think I'll open them all tomorrow. I can't choose for one. And I'm really tired."

"It's your choice." Sirius said and shrugged. "Are you alright?" he asked concered.

"Yes, as I said, just tired. I think I go to bed now. Good night Sirius, night Remus." she said and left the room.

"So worse?" Sirius asked Remus after Rose left.

"Unbreadable." Remus said and put his head in his hands. "It'll kill me."

"Non-sense... but if it does, it's all your fault." he said and smiled innocently.

After this event, nothing was like before. Remus seems to be nervous around her, and always found a excuse to leave the room she was currently in.  
>Rose was confused and hurt. She couldn't tell she did or said something that made to werewolf act like that. She was close to tears. It hurt her, how the werewolf kept her on distance. She knew he would never love her, he would probably be disgusted by the way she felt for him, but she learned the value of a good friendship. She needed the wolf. He understood her, and she knew, secretly, she and Sirius were the only one who understood him.<p>

A single tear made it's way down her cheek, she didn't bother to wipe it away. Her thoughts still by Remus and with a great pain in her chest she decided to talk to him.

She took a deep breath and collect her thoughts. There were two way this could end, either there were a simple explanation and she worried for nothing, or...

Rose stood in front of Remus bedroom door and knocked.

...or he found out and hate me now.

She paled was about to run back to her room, but Remus already opened the door.

"Can I help you, Rose?" he asked gently.

"I hope so." she said and stepped into the room.


	2. Let the disasters begin

_She took a deep breath and collect her thoughts. There were two ways this could end, either there were a simple explanation and she worried for nothing, or..._

_Rose stood in front of Remus bedroom door and knocked._

_...or he found out and hate me now._

_She paled was about to run back to her room, but Remus already opened the door._

_"Can I help you, Rose?" he asked gently._

_"I hope so." she said and stepped into the room._

* * *

><p>It was hard to breath for Remus, as soon as Rose entered his room. Her scent overwhelmed him.<p>

"Remus... we need to talk." his former student said. Remus could see how insecure she was... and caught himself finding it cute. He couldn't remember seeing Rose insecure like this. Carefully he looked at her, and saw the fear in her eyes. Now Rose wasn't the only insecure person in this room anymore. He swallowed audibly, wondering if she found out about his feelings.

"How can I help you, Rose?" he asked and hoped she wouldn't notice how nervous he was now.

"It's... it's just... I-I noticed you..." she stuttered and looking at her feet. This was totally not how Rose normally is, Remus thought.

"I what?" he asked and tried to offer her a small smile. He thought it would calm her, but unfortunatly it only made her more nervous. She looked at him, how he smiled at her.

_He's so damn cute. Isn't there any law how forbit it to be so cute when you're unattainable?_

"I'm sorry." she said and looked away. She felt like an idiot. Now, she wasn't even so sure he ever avoided her. Maybe she was totally wrong, and is going to make a fool of herself.

_No. You will do this now. You came here to confront him, and you will do it now! What can happen? If you're wrong, you will just laugh about it. He won't be mad. Right?_

"It's just... it feels like you would avoid me lately. I feel lonely." she choked out.

Remus smile dopped. It was true, he really avoided her, but only for her own good. Since Rose's third year when she came back to the pack, so to say, he feard that she would be his mate. Most often the mate was someone from the pack, and Rose was the possibility left, since Sirius wasn't his mate.

Sometimes he wasn't that upset about it. He was waiting for his mate since almost four decates. At times he wondered if his mate died during the first war. The thought was unbearable. The mate was much more than love. The mate and the werewolf were simply perfect for each other. They complete each other in every possible way.

Sirius often liked to joke about it. It was sure for him, that Rose was his mate. Remus was pretty shocked when he heard Sirius joking about it for the first time. To be honest, he feared the reaction of her godfather the most, until he heard it.  
><em>'Come on, let's be honest: You two are perfect for each other. Everybody can see it.' <em>He said during the Christmas holidays last year.  
>Well, it was true. Remus and Rose had a lot in common, and sometimes they talked for hours, until one of them realized it was already one o'clock in the morning.<br>But Remus was only a father figure for her. But besides that, why'd she love him. He was much older, a friend of her parents and godfather, her former teacher, a werewolf, poor and a thousend other reasons. A thousend reasons why he had only one girlfriend before, who left him after she learned he was a werewolf.

It happened at her sixteenth birthday. When the clock struck twelve, Remus felt he found his mate. There was something inside him, that was pulling him towards... towards Rose. Suddenly the whole room smelled like her. Her scent was breathtaking. It was the most gorgeous smell ever, and Remus wanted to inhale it as deep as possible, and eventually for the rest of his life.  
>He looked at her and realized how beautiful she was. How perfect her unruly hair matches with-<br>_Merlin, stop it! Are you a teenager? Guess not, you bloody werewolf! Remember whoms daughter she is!_ He thought and tried to act as normal as possible, but failed miserably.

Remus thought fast of an excuse.

"Rose, I'm really sorry for that, but I can assure you, I'm not avoiding you. Not on porpose at least. I have a lot of stuff to do for the Order and... I know we can't spend a lot of time together, but it's really only because of the order.." he said and knew he sounds like an idiot.

_'I sounds like a child, who stole a lolly and want to make a stupid excuse like 'the lolly told me so_'.

"But," he said. "I think I'm done with everything tomorrow, and I'll have much more time for you." he smiled brightly at her.

_What. Am. I. Doing. Here?_

Rose looked at him and smiled softly. He didn't knew why, but something was telling him she knew something was wrong.

_Of course she knows! She and Sirius knows you best. They knows when something is wrong with you._

"Okay. I would really love to spend more time with you again, you know." she said and fumbled nervouse at her shirt.

"That's nice to hear. I enjoy your company as well, cub." he said and hugged her. Immanently the breathtaking scent tickled his nose. The combination of her warm body against his made him feel high-headed and knew he should end this embrace as soon as possible, before it becomes awkward, but it felt so good.

People who knew he was a werewolf, generally avoid to touch him. It was totally stupid but on the other side, Remus could understand it. Nobody liked to touch a dark creature, especially not, when this creature was known and able to kill people or worse, curse their lives like his own life was cursed. But Rose was different. She never hestiteded to touch or hug him, and that meant a lot to Remus.

* * *

><p>The days goes by, and Remus hold on his promise. He tried his best to spend more time with Rose, even when it was hard sometimes. The wolf inside of him wanted the mate, and fought. It was a inner fight to calm the wolf and didn't let it take over. Merlin knows what would have happened. From time to time even the human part of Remus almost got weak and want to give in. He wanted to tell her so badly what he was feeling for her. He wanted to tell her how gorgeous she is, how much he adored her, wanted her, loved her. But of course he wouldn't let this happened, and so he left before he made something stupid. But in the end, the two spend much more time together, and enjoyed it.<p>

"Merlin, my mom was really awesome." Rose laughed when Remus told her about James attempts to get a date with Lily.

"Yes, even when it was totally annoying for James." Remus grinned of the memories of his schooltime.

"Talking about our Hogwarts time?" Sirius entered the room.

"Yes, about James attempts to date Lily."

"Merlin, the poor guy." Sirius laughed.

"Sometimes I really wonder why he doesn't gave up on her. I mean, she wasn't exactly nice to him." Rose frowned.

"Well, Lily was something special for your father." Sirius sat down next to her. "One day, you'll find someone you'll love like you never loved anyone before. Someone you just can't get out of your head, no matter how hard you try. And even if this person will be... unkind to you, you'll love him... because he's something special. Like Lily was for James. And in the end, he was right, wasn't he?"

Remus rubbed his palms nervously.

"IF I find someone like this." Rose sigh.

"Why wouldn't YOU find someone like this?" Sirius asked astounded. "You're a handsome nice young lady, Rose. I bet a lot of guys like you."

"No, they don't like me, they like the-Girl-Who-Lived. It's a different." she said upset.

"Rose, you're young." Remus said. "And when people get you known better, they'll see how wonderful you are. And one day, there will be someone who loves you. You for being you, and not for what people talk about you."

"Right. Someday. Someone. And you'll see he's perfect for you." Sirius said and lay and arm around her shoulders. "Right, Moony?"

"Right." the other Marauder answered and looked warningly at him.

Rose sighed. _If they would know..._

"There is guy, I really like. Since a long time but-"

There was a lould rumble in the corridor and a moment later Mrs. Black start insulting whoever was trying to cross the hallway.

Sirius and Remus jumped from their seats and run to the source of the noise. Rose following to see who came to visit. The curtain in front of Sirius' mother portrait were already closed when she entered the hallway, seeing Tonks excusing.

"I really don't know how this could happen." the currently light brown-haired woman said.

"Well, let's go into the kitchen before the gates to hell open again." Sirius whispered, pointing at the portrait.

"So, what happened?" Remus asked concerned.

"Huh?"

"Well, why are you here? Has something happened?"

"No, no." Tonks said and smiled at the werewolf. "I was just bored and thought I come over to visit you."

"Great. I was scared because of-" Remus looked at Rose and waved about the uncomplete sentence. "...you know."

"Yes, but everything is alright." Tonks said and sat down next to Remus. "And what are you guys doing?"

"Nothing peticular." Sirius answered and shrugged.

"Good, so... can I talk to you Remus? In private?" she asked, smiling shyly at him.

"Um... of course." he said visibly uncomfortable, and the two left the room.

Sirius giggled and moved closer to Rose.

"You know, Tonks has a huge crush on Remus." he giggled to his godchild.

The young Gryffindor felt her heart break. Suddenly there wasn't enough air in the room. Her heart hurt like someone stab it with a edgeless object.

"I... I think I'll make some homework." she said, wanting to leave the room as fast as possible.

"Awww, come on. You can't leave me alone." Sirius protest, but Rose didn't care and left.

Tears burning in her eyes. Her hands shiver when she closed the door of her room. Slowly she went to her desk and tried to think clear.

Tonks was a beautiful, clever and nice person. She was young, but not as young as Rose.

_And what am I?_ She thought bitterly. _Why would he ever love me, when he can have someone like Tonks?_

She knew he'll never respons her feelings, but she wasn't aware how it would be, if he loves someone else. Since almost three years he was so to say her life. She thought about him every secound. Imagine how it would be to be together with him, love him, taste him, be there for him before and after the fullmoon. She had plans to become an animagus and staying with him during the full moon nights. She was sure that she could never love someone else like this, because he seems to be all she needed. He was perfect in his own way to her. The thoughts were her escape when she have had enough of her life. She always told to herself he would never love her like she loved him, but only now she realized what that means.

_But how could I be so stupid?_She thought, trying to controll her emotions. Everything made sense now. She remembered when Remus started to avoid her. It was the day after her birthday. The Order had a meeting and Tonks stayed afterwards. Probably she had told Remus about her feelings. Or maybe Remus told her about his feelings. Remus was just in love, busy with his thoughts, feelings, writing and waiting for letters. If someone knows what it feels like, then it was Rose.

Tears streaming down her face and amass at her chin. She should have seen this coming, after all she was the one who knows best what a wonderful person he was. The question was, what she would do to accept this painful fate.

-A floor deeper-

"Did you think about what I told you, Remus?" Tonks asked and smiled at him suducively.

"There was nothing to think about, Dora." he answered slightly annoyed. "I told you how I feel, and it didn't changed."

"But..."

"No buts. I'm sorry Tonks, but I just don't feel the same." Remus said.

"We could try. Maybe you'll start feeling the same for me!" she begged. "You'll never know!"

"Tonks, I already found my mate, and it's not you."

"Oh really?" she snapped, arms akimbo. "And who is your mate?"

"I think it's really not your business."

"I'm just curios. You said you found your mate, but for me it looks like you're still single. You could have told me you have another one and..."

"Tonks!" Remus rised his voice. "As I said, it is _not_ your business."

"It is! I love you as well. I want to know who she is!" she shoutet.

"Well, if you want to know: My mate doesn't know it yet, but it doesn't make me feel diffrent. I love her, and she is the only – the ONLY – person I love!" he shoutet back and left the room.

_Merlin, this woman can be annoying. Opposites attract is simply a lie._

Tonks left shortly after their little...um...conversation. Sirius was still in kitchen reading the Evening Prophet when an pissed werewolf entered the room.

"And?" the animagus asked and smirked, because he knew the answer. He simply found it amusing how his little cousin tried to attract his best friened every time she saw him, and how annoyed Remus was.  
>Yes, Sirius Black just loved it when people were pissed and he could make fun of it. Especilly when this one was either Remus or Rose.<p>

"How can a person be so... stubborn?" Remus didn't understand what was so incomprehensible about a 'no, I don't want to date you'.

"Well, it's Tonks..." Sirius said lazyly and start reading again. "And don't forget: You're mate is stubborn as well."

"Yes, but's she's... it's different." the werewolf said and start compairing the supper.

Sirius chuckled.

"It's not funny, Padfoot!"

"Mr. Padfoot thinks it is pretty amusing."

"Mr. Moony likes to tell Mr. Padfoot that he's a git."

"Mr. Padfoot is hurt." Sirius looked up from the papers and pout.

"Mr. Moony doesn't care." Remus said still slightly annoyed and continued making supper.

"Mr. Padfoot wants to say sorry..." he tried to soother the werewolf with his best puppy-eyes.

"Mr. Moony can't believe his ears. Does Mr. Padfoot said he wants to say sorry?" he asked in disbelieve.

"Nah. Mr. Padfoot was lying. It IS funny!" Sirius laughed.

Even Remus couldn't hold back a chuckle. Mr. Padfoot just knows how to cheer people up.

"Oh, where's Rose, by the way? She was with you in the kitchen before I left." Remus asked.

"I'm here." said a small voice from the doorframe. "I...I was finishing my potions essay."

"Are you okay? You look rather pale." Remus asked concerend.

"I'm fine." she said and sat down next to Sirius.

Sirius and Remus started to talking about something in the Prophet, but Rose didn't listen. From time to time she looked at Remus, who seems to be quite cheerful.

She closed her eyes for a second, repeating what she told herself earlier.

_You should have known this would happen some day, so calm down. You love him, so be happy for him, that's what people do when they love someone. Let alone he'd never love you. You're like a surrogate niece to him, so act like that._

During the supper, Sirius and Remus asked her again, if everything was alright, and she just nodded. It was hard for her, but the mental image of what would happen when they get to know what she's feeling right now, or better said for who she has feelings since three years, was much more worse.

"So, what about some tea?" Remus asked.

"Not for me. I'm going to bed. Dumbledore wants to talk with me tomorrow... at a utterly unpleasant hour." Sirius sighed. He kissed Rose at her temple, waving at Remus and said goodnight.

"So, it's only the two of us." Remus said happily. "What about I make some tea and we go to the living room, continue the talk from earlier?"

"Okay." Rose said upset.

She really doesn't want to spend time with Remus now. She want to go to her room and think about what Sirius told her today.

_Be happy for him!_ She reminded herself.

"And you're sure, you're alright?" Remus asked her again, entering the room, a plate with two cups and a teapot in his hands.

"I think I get ill." she said and thought it's wasn't really a lie.

"If you still feel like this tomorrow, tell me, I'll take a look at you."

"Thanks." Rose said and smiled at him.

"Remus," she said in a husky voice. "I..."

_Show him that you're happy for him! You said yourself you're okay with a friendship, and you don't want to be a prat, right? So make the first step to accept the inevitable. _

"I'm happy for you and Tonks." she forced herself to say this and swallowed the painful lump in her throat.

_Sirius, you bast-_ but Remus thought were interrupted by Tonks, who entered the room.

"Here, I forgot this." she said and handed Remus a paper. "Oh, and I'll stay here over the night, if it's okay. I'm too tired to fly back home."

That was too much. Rose left the room without another word. Tears were steaming down her face when she was on the way to her room. As she wouldn't know what that means! Tonks stays over the night, with a Remus who looks rather cheerful after he talked to her earlier.

_I'm a liar! I can't handle this, and I know that! I love him too much as I can share him with anyone. Merlin, what am I thinking? He doesn't love me. He isn't mine, but I can't share. There's nothing to share, you stupid idiot of a girl!_

This night, Rose would cry herself to sleep.

"Tonks? I didn't heard you coming in." Remus asked, dumbfounded about the whole situation.

"Well, I'm much more than a cumpsy little girl." she looked proud at him. "But some people just don't realize it."

_Not that again._ Remus thought tiredly.

* * *

><p>And another chapter is done. I'm really sorry for making Tonks so annoying. I actually really like her, but first I think this makes the story much more interesting and second, I don't think Tonks would be like 'Oh, you have someone else. No problem, that's cool.' I hope all the Tonks fans out there forgive me. ^^<p>

Also, I want to say thanks to:

**Lupinesence**- Thanks for your review. :) I'm happy to make you read a Fem!Harry story. Trust me, there are some really good storys out there.

**Hermione1017**- Thank you!

**TheBlackSeaReaper**- Thank you! Yes, sadly there are only a few (good) Fem!Harry/Remus storys. But this won't be my last one. ;)

**Nataly SkyPot** - Gracias por la revisión. (HA! I speak some Spanish, too. ^^)


	3. It's not what it looks like

_"Tonks? I didn't heard you coming in." Remus asked, dumbfounded about the whole situation._

_"Well, I'm much more than a cumpsy little girl." she looked proud at him. "But some people just don't realize it."_

_Not that again. Remus thought tiredly.  
><em>

* * *

><p>Tonks started to convince him, again, why they should date, but the Marauder doesn't really listen to her.<p>

He couldn't believe Sirius told Rose such a rubbish! They're far away from dating, much less being together!  
>Tonks told him about her feelings last year. It was the night when Remus brought her, Moody and Sherlock to St. Mungo's after their fight in the Ministry. It was the first time they fought too. Remus told her carefully that he just doesn't feel anything for her, and she started to beg for a chance. Normally Remus would have given her this chance but hell, only a few hours ago he nearly lost his best friend and Harry as well when he didn't stopped him.<br>Since this night it was always the same when they meet. The first attempts from her were rather cute, but now it's just annoying.

"...and because of this, I can stay with you during the full moon; and..."

"Yeah..." Remus didn't even try to stop her. She would become mad, they're shouting at each other, and tomorrow she'll start again. It was a never endling story.

_She's... happy for me and Tonks. Happy... for..._ he sigh defeated. It was a strange feeling. He knew she didn't love him, yet it was painful to hear it from her. If he was honest to himself, he knew it was the last gleam of hope which went out.

"...so, PLEASE! One more chance! Let us go out for a date!" Tonks pleading, and doesn't notice Remus' mental absence.

"yeah..." he answered lazyly to whatever the woman would say.

So... I think it's the prove, she really doesn't want anything from me. Ha. Did I really thought she'd-

A pair of arms that was squeezing him tightly brought him back to reality.

"Thank you! I knew you would say yes!" she murmbled into his robes.

"I... what?" he asked perplexed.

"Tomorrow. Two o'clock, so we can spend the whole afternoon and evening together. I'm come over and fetch you. See you!" Tonks said overjoyed and left a fairly confused Remus.

"What the heck?" he thought loudly. "Did I just agreed to a date with Tonks? How... _What_?"

Rose was woken by the smell of toast and bacon. She rub her eyes and felt how swollen they were. The event of the last night slipped back into her mind, and she wanted to stay in bed.

_I hate my life. Isn't it a beautiful thought to get up?_

"Good morning, Rose." Remus greeted her tiredly when she scuffed tiredly into the kitchen.

He kept almost the whole night awake, thinking about what happened yesterday. Rose was definitely not interested in Remus, and he agreed to a date with the most annoying person he knew.  
>At least he still can be friends with Rose, right? Not that there was a chance, she'd see him as more than a uncle. Now it was just said out loud.<p>

"Good morning, Moony." Rose said tiredy as well.

Remus felt his heart ache at the sound of his old nickname.

_Yes. Uncle Moo'y. No more, no less_. He thought bitterly.

Rose notice his tiredness. He's never tired in the morning. How this was possible was beyond her. He's a morning-person through and through. Then she thought about Tonks unexpected visit last night, and her heart ache by the obvious explaination of his state.

"Everything alright?" Remus asked when he watched her getting pale and looking like she would vomit every second.

"Headache." she chocked out.

"Here," he took a potion out of the shelf over the sink. "it's a pepper-up potion. It'll help."

"Thanks."

_Does it help against a lovesickness heart and stupid thoughts?_

"Where's Sirius? I thought he wanted to stay up early?" Rose asked.

"He's already at Hogwarts, talking to Dumbledore." Remus said while he serve the breakfast. "He left a note."

"Oh." Rose said and thought: "Geart. Another day alone with the man who broke my heart."

"What do you want to do today?" he asked.

"I think I'm going to write Hermione and Ron." she said as casually as possible.

"Good. I...well, have a... meeting with Tonks today. She'll be here at two o'clock. I try to be back as soon as possible."

_Meeting. Sure. Who does he wants to fool?_

Remus thought about to explain Rose that he doesn't date Tonks, but decided to don't. He wasn't in the mood for anything this morning, and honestly, Rose wouldn't care, would she?  
>Maybe he would tell her later, when he comes back.<p>

"Ah. Well, I'm in my room then."

"You didn't eat all of your bacon." Remus said worried.

"I'm... not very hungry." she said and left the kitchen.

_So, why is he lying to me. A meeting. Really? If I wouldn't known. I even told him I'm happy for them. Maybe he just forgot after his love entered the room._ Rose thought bitterly._ No, no, no! Stop that! You won't act like a jealous prat, who starts to cry when you're not in center for a minute! Besides, Remus'd never love you. He has a damned life, so be happy for him, he finally found someone who makes him happy!_

But as much as she wanted to be happy for him, her heart ache of lovesickness. Rose wasn't a selfish person, and she loved to see people around her happy. But why in the name of the founders of Hogwarts, couldn't she be happy one time? Why can't he fall in love with Rose? Was it too much to ask for to being loved by this one person?

She took a deep breath and start writing a letter to Hermione. Since last night she thought about to tell someone. She just needed someone to talk about the mess, and her best femile friend seems to be the right person. Yes, Hermione will tell her how disgusting it is, to fall in love with your father's best friend, but maybe this was exacty what she needed. Just someone who bring her back down to earth. Also, Hermione was the only person she knew, who had a brilliant idea to take those things off her mind.

_Hi Hermione,_

_how are you doing? I hope your holidays are more fun then mine. I need your help, and please swear you won't tell anyone about what I'm going to tell you now._  
><em>Since my third year, I'm in love with Remus. Yes, I know it's weird, but I can't help it! I just love him, I love everything about him! He's so amazing! And please don't start telling me how wrong this is, I already know.<em>  
><em>So, now it's going to be a bit complicated. Of course he doesn't know that I love him. Nobody knows, you're the first person I ever tell this!<em>  
><em>Tonks visited yesterday and I get to know that they are dating. It's literally breaks my heart! I didn't even know you really have physically pain when 'your heart breaks'!<em>  
><em>So, I think you know what I wanna say. I don't know what to do. I should be happy for them, but I can't. I love him so much. I knew he would never love me, but seeing him with someone else is horrible.<em>  
><em>I don't even know if I want to get over him. He's everything to me. I don't want to give up on him so easily, though it's senseless. I'm so confused.<em>  
><em>Hermione, please help me!<em>

_Yours truly,_  
><em>Rose Potter<em>

She watched Hedwig flying away with her letter, slowly getting smaller and smaller on the morning sky.

Rose kept the rest of the morning in her room, writing a letter to Ron and waiting for Hermione's answer. The whole time she tried to ignore what Remus was about to do later. She decided to don't think about Remus and Tonks as long as she has an answer from Hermione. It was easier said, then done. Every time the thought came back to her mind, she wanted to curl up and cry.

Sirius came back, at about one o'clock. He looked tired and tense.

"What is it?" Remus asked him concerend.

"I have to leave tomorrow for a few days. Dumbledore wants me to go to a small wizward village anywhere in the north of Scotland." he sighed. "Merlin, why can't it wait until after the holidays? I want to use the time to spend it with Rose, and not some relusive wizwards. What about you? You look like a mess."

"I've a date with Tonks later." he growled.

"Aww." Sirius chucked.

"Shut up. It's not funny."

"Where's the nicer part of you?" Sirius asked, still chuckling.

"In her room, writing to Ron and Hermione."

Sirius made his way to Rose room, still smirking and wondering if Remus noticed how he asked him.

Rose was about to cry when Sirius told her that he'd leave. How should she survive this? She was cooped up with the man who broke her heart and his girlfriend, who was the reason for this disaster! She will be confronted with the unbreadable fact that the only one she loved like no one else, would never be hers.

"Rose, what's wrong?" Sirius laid an arm around her shoulders. "I'll be back as soon as possible. I'm really sorry, but I have to do it. You understand it, right?"

"I'm fine and it's okay."

"Remus will be there for you." he kissed her hair and got up. "You know, he really likes you, he just can't show it so good. If you need me, I'll take a little nap."

And then he left, a now totally confused Rose.

"So, you're ready?" Tonks was hopping happyly in the hallway.

Remus sighed. His head was aching badly. He thought about to tell Tonks that me agreed accidentally, and doesn't really want to go to a date with her. Although this would make her mad again, she would scream at him... you know the rest.

Maybe he could simply tell her that he got sick. It wasn't even so much a lie. But probally she would think that he only pretends, becoming mad, starts screaming...

"Do I have another choice?" he asked half joking, half serious.

"No!" she peeped exited, took his hand and dragged him to the front door.

Rose was in her room, trying to ignore Tonks' voice, which made her furiose. She tried to be not mad at Tonks, but this wasn't so easy. Rose really liked Tonks, and always enjoyed her company. She was an amazing, gorgeous and witty woman. Unfortunatly this were probablly the reason why Rose was suffering right now. Still she couldn't be mad at her or even hate her. Remus was perfection in person, so how could she blame Tonks' for loving him? Again a woman like Tonks' could have very boy she wanted, so why does it has to be the person Rose fell in love with?

Mad with the whole world, she wanted to scream in frustration.

_I need to distract me from those thoughts, before I become mad._

The distract came a second later by a soft hooting from the windowsill. Hedwig was back and looked concerned at her jumped up to get the letter, finally she has an answer from Hermione.

_Dear Rose,_

_to be honest, I'm a little bit aghast. Why did you never told me? You know you can tell me everything, and maybe I could help you earlier._  
><em>Don't think this is weird. You can't control with who you fall in love with, and your heart always has a reason why it's this certain person.<em>  
><em>I'm really sorry for you, about Remus and Tonks. There are two things I'd like to suggest you. The first thing: Live with it. It sounds hard, but as you said, you can't do anything about it. They love each other, and as horrible as it is, you can't change it. Also you can't waste your life waiting for Remus to maybe break up with Tonks. You have to move on, Rose. There are a lot of nice guys who'd like to be together with you.<em>  
><em>The second suggest, which maybe helps you in the context of my first suggest: Tell Remus what you feel. You'll see, it'll help to get it off of your chest. He'll say no, but on the one hand it'll help you to accept it fully and on the other hand, you can finally left it behind you, and move on.<em>  
><em>I know it's harder as it sounds, but I thinks it's better to tell him and knowing what he'll say, then tell him and being dissapointed.<em>

_And before I forget, my parents said I'll be going to visit you next week. I hope you'll be better until then. And if not, I can help you (even better than per letter)._

_Yours truly,_  
><em>Hermione Granger<em>

Rose read the letter twice. Was Hermione mad? Telling Remus that she loves him? It was pretty much the last thing she would do. Hermione might knowing everything about school stuff, but it seems like she had no idea of trouble with a broken heart.

She put the letter away, took an book and went down to the living room.

"Hey cub." Sirius greeted her tiredly. "I thought you'll never come out of your room again."

"Hey Sirius. Well, I made some howework after I wrote Hermione and Ron."

"You do a lots of homework lately." he frowned. "Do you want to tell me anything?"

Rose sat down next to Sirius and put her book aside. She really wanted to tell Sirius about her probelm, because he always knew what to do. Maybe he would have a simple but brilliant idea, like he always had. But of couse she couldn't tell him anything. What would he think of her when he hears that his godchild fell in love with his best friends?  
>The young Gryffindor was just afraid to find it out. He was her family, and she can't imaging to lose him, because she can't controll her feelings.<br>She nearly lost him forever only a few weeks ago. Bellatrix tried to kill him, but thanks god Sirius was faster and jump out of the way, when she fired the killing curse at him.

"I don't know. I'm just... there are so many things I try to handle. But I'm scared that I can't handle it, and it'll destroy me." she said.

"Tell me about." Sirius said gently and put an arm around her shoulder.

"I'm in... love with a guy. But he'll never love me."

"How do you know that?"

"I just know it."

"You'll never know if you don't tell him... or show him."

"Show him?"

"Well, you know, when you flirt with him. It's easier and safer than telling him. When he returns your flirting, you know you can go further, if he doesn't, you're allowed to say he doesn't love you."

"I don't even know how to flirt."

"Oh, come on! A shy smile here, a shy smile there. A 'inadvertent' touch here, a maybe not so inadvertent touch there..."

"But I just can't..." she put her head in her hands. "...you don't understand. It's much more complicated."

"Rose, if you really love him, you will try it at least. Getting dumped hurts, but it won't kill you, and you will get over it. And remember, someday, you'll find the right one who loves you too." he said and hugged her. "Puberty is a bitch."

"Yeah." she sniffed against his robes. "And it hates me."

He chuckled. "You wanna tell who he is?"

"No. You wouldn't understand."

"It's okay when you don't want to tell me. Just remember I'm always here when you need to talk."

Rose thought about what Sirius said. Two people told her to tell Remus about her feelings. Sirius was maybe right, that being dumped normally didn't kill you, but for Rose, this was something else. It wasn't only a teenager crush, you laugh about in some years, this was true love. She wouldn't get over this so fast. It was just too risky to tell him and lose the last thing got left: The friendship.

At about six o'clock, an exhaust Remus Lupin closed the door behind him, and was just happy to be back. It took him forever to conviced Tonks that he still had something to do for the order, and he really has to go back now.

He looked up when he heard someone giggle.

"Looks like you had a wonderful afternoon." Sirius said sarcastic.

"Oh, shut up!" Remus made his way slowly to the livingroom. He noticed with great relief that Rose sitting on the couch with a book. At least he could spend the rest of the day with Rose and maybe telling her that he doesn't dating Tonks.

"Hey Remus." she greeted him and smiled slightly.

"Hello cub." he said and sat down across her.

"And? What happened?" Sirius asked curiously and still smiling.

"What do you think happened?" Seriously, this man knows his cousin. She was one of the clumpsiest person and earth, and so went the date. When she wasn't making arguments why she and Remus were perfect for each other, she upset or tripped over something. At least he can say now, he never got so many attention from a crowd like today.

Rose pretend to read and hoped they woudn't notice her eyes start watering again. She could imagine what they did during the 'meeting'...

The rest of the evening went quiet comfortable for all of them. They didn't mention the _meeting_ again, and talked about casual things. For the first time since weeks, she felt totally unworried, like it was before. Just Sirius, Remus and Rose, talking about everything and anything. Like a proper little family.

Remus even told Rose about James attempt to impress Lily with a difficult flyingtrick, where he end up in the hospital for two weeks, and how upset he was when he didn't even get a get well soon card from her.

It was ten o'clock when the trio decided to go to bed. Rose couldn't sleep at all. She never thought she would be able to say that, but she was just too happy.

_Why can't it always be like that? Just sitting together and talk? Just having fun and enjoy each others company. ...why do I have to screw everything up?_

And so, her good mood was gone.

Remus walked tiredly to his room. It was a horrible day with a perfect ending. He just loved being around Rose and Sirius. His friend was so right when he said they would be a proper family when this is all over. He would vowed they'd be one of the most wonderful family of all time...

_...when I don't screw everything up. Damn these mate stuff!_

He kicked the door to his room open, and noticed a little white paper on his dark blue sheets.

_Hi Moony,_

_in case I can't tell you in person before I leave:_  
><em>Today I found out that Rose is in love with someone. I don't know who, but this idiot of a boy doesn't love her. Of course she's lovesick... use the chance!<em>

_Padfoot_

Jealously stabbed his heart and growled softly into the darkness. The wolf inside him was frantic.  
>Remus took the little paper and threw it into the trashbin. Yes, he would try to comfort Rose, but he wouldn't take advantage of her lovesickness. She didn't loved him anyways, though he wanted to find out who this boy was.<p>

Sirius was lying in the bed, and thought about the next step of bringing his best friend and his godchild together.

_They are both so blind_. Was the last thought before he fell fast asleep.

* * *

><p>Hello dears.<br>I hope you enjoyed the third chapter (and maybe review?).  
>This chapter might be a bit boring, because nothing really happems, but I'll need it for the plot. And yes I have to send Sirius away, because he has a plan... and it'd make this FF way too short. :D<p>

**And by the way: Check out my profile to read my new Fem!Harry/Remus Fic _A very special present_ (it's only a One-Shot, but a 'special' one :)). **

And of course I want to thank some people again:

**TheBlackSeaReaper**- Thank you! 3

**Lupinscence**- Thank you. And they will spend even more time together in the next chapter. :)

**cottencandykitten**- Thank you! :)

**Sharnorasian Empire** - Hell, I planned everything and had to change the first things in the secound chapter. D: It's really not easy to plan, I don't care. I love reading and writing Fem!Harry storys. :)

xoxo


	4. Cruel reality

You probably know the laziness that comes with the holidays. It begins in the morning, you have a lie-in every day, and even when you're as rested as possible, you just don't want to get up.  
>But in this particular case, Rose didn't want to get up because she's lazy, she didn't want to get up because she was exhaust and didn't want to face the cruel reality again.<br>She woke up two hours ago, when she heard someone leaving the house. It was Sirius who left for the mission. Only the fear of the questions he'd ask, made her resisting the urge to run after and beg him to stay.

Meanwhile Sirius Black was just pissed. It was too early, it was too cold, it was too rainy, it was too everything that Sirius Black doesn't like. If it wasn't for the order, he'd just turn around and go back to bed, where people belong at this time of the day!  
>On the way to village he was wondering, what would happened in his absence. He really hoped his plan will work, and Remus will be curious enough to try to figure out who this mysterious guy was. The imagination of Remus trying desperately to find out who he is, Rose's face turning deep red, while both stumble like idiots made him chuckle.<p>

To be honestly, Sirius himself didn't saw the signs to begin with, too. It was in the summer last year, when Rose and the Weasleys where at Grimmauld Place and Ron complained how much time she spend with Remus instead with her friends.  
>First Sirius didn't mind at all. She saw her friends every day in school, so what's the problem when she wanted to spend more time with Remus and him during the holidays?<p>

It was the moment when he was watching them, when he realised that something were different.  
>Rose and Remus were sitting on the couch in the living room, Sirius was standing in the door frame and was about to say something, but then he remembered Ron's words.<br>Before this, he considered them as good friends or as surrogate niece and uncle, but now there was something else. (_...she spends so much time with _Remus_..._) He took a close look at Rose and saw what was different. The way she looked at him, the way she smiles at him. Just everything. Besides this, as Ron said, she spend a lot time with _Remus_. He didn't want to complain, actually he was pretty happy they got along so well. (_...did I miss something?_)  
><em>Well, yes Ron, you missed something, but I missed it as well.<em>

It took him a few days to think that through. He didn't really liked the idea of Rose has fallen in love with Remus. It was wrong, wasn't it? Remus was 20 years older than Rose, her former Professor and on of her parents best friends. But every time he remembered back at this day, he saw was pure love and a kind of perfection. Rose would never mind his fury little problem, she would care about him, like he'd care about her. Rose was 20 years younger, but mentally she was at least as old as Remus. She saw so many bad things, so many bad things happened to her, like so many bad things Remus saw and happened to him. They both complete each other. They understand each other. And somehow he knew for sure, they would love each other, until the very end of their days.

Almost a year later, only a few days before Rose's birthday, Remus came to Sirius and wanted to talk about all the mate stuff. He informed Sirius that he consider Rose as his mate.  
>Yes, now he liked the idea of Rose and Remus together, but he never thought he would be so happy when Remus, so to say, confessed he loves her as well. Sadly he never really had the chance to tell Remus how happy he really was.<p>

Remus looked like a mess when he told him, everything that bothered Sirius a year ago, seems to bother him right now, probably even more. He was all the more surprised when the Animagus told him it would be okay for him. Before Sirius could tell him that he suspected that Rose has a crush on the werewolf, Remus made hin swear to never tell Rose about it.  
>No matter how hard Sirius tried to make him listen, Remus would adamant that he made the promise first.<p>

"Merlin, why is this so important for you that you don't even listen to me first?" craved Sirius desperately.

"Please, Padfoot, just swear! If she finds out... can you imagine what she'll say... what she'll do? She will hate me!"

"Remus.."

"Please!"

"Ok I swear I won't tell her anything."

The ex-convicted was just pissed how stubborn his friend was, and he swore himself to get them together. But first he had to make sure that Rose really loves Remus, or better say still loves Remus. He really hoped it wasn't only a crush, and she was already over it. Besides... it could end pretty awkward.

Thanks Merlin, this summer he got his speculations confirmed. As soon as Sirius told Rose about Tonks feelings, he knew he was right. It was hard to watch her like this, but he just hoped Rose would understand his action later.  
>Again he tried to drop as many hints as possible for Remus, but the werewolf didn't (or wanted to) understand.<br>And actually Rose wasn't any better, though the chance were better that she would listen to him, and tell him about her feelings.

Sirius looked at the small village and sighed.  
><em>Let's be honest old mut, you like to play the undercover love-agent.<em>  
>Another chuckle escaped his lips, while he walking towards the village, still hoping everything will be alright in his absence.<p>

* * *

><p>Today's reality doesn't seem to be cruel so far, but something was odd. Remus didn't talked much during the dinner and he looked like Rose felt: exhaust. Too scared that the answer contains a certain woman she tried to ignore, she didn't asked what was wrong with him.<p>

Rose was wondering how his love for Tonks would change they friendship. Rose wanted to know what's wrong, she wanted to listen and care about him, but now she acted like she doesn't care at all. It was wrong, but when he only mention Tonks, her heart would break a little more. It wasn't right at all, and she knew it. She just didn't know how to change it.

"Remus?" peeped a voice in the living room.

_No. Just no!_ Rose and Remus thought.

"Over here." he answered lazily.

The currently light brown haired woman entered the room. Her smile was way too bright for Rose taste. The black hair girl just wanted too leave the room as fast as possible. Nothing against Tonks but she just couldn't stand her now... or ever again, but her next words and the next thing she did, caused a shock for both of them.

"Hello darling!" said Tonks as overjoyed as always and kissed Remus on the cheek.

"Tonks!" Remus said as shocked as Rose felt.

"Awww, come on!" said Tonks and nudged him. "I'm just here to ask you, if you want to go out with me tonight again. It was wonderful last time!"

"I'm sorry," said Remus uneasily. "Sirius is on a mission and I can't leave Rose alone."

"Come on, she's sixteen, she can take care of herself."

"Sirius will kill me. Sorry, but I can't." he said and prayed silently she wouldn't start screaming again.

Tonks looked between Remus and Rose and decided that this wasn't the right place, to say what she liked to say.

"Well, then I'll ask you when Sirius's back, again." said Tonks rather pissed and flooed home again.

_What was that?_ Rose thought.

"I can take care of myself, Remus. If you want to-" she said shyly.

"No, it's okay. As I said, Sirius will kill me, and besides you're only here when you've holidays, and we should spend this time useful together." he said and smiled his gentle smile that Rose loved so much.

Suddenly Rose felt very dizzy. Did Remus just dumped Tonks to spend time with her? He dumped his girlfriend...? The only thing she was able to was grinning.

"So, what are we doing today?" she asked.

"Everything you want to do." he simply answered.

"I really like to hear the rest of the story from yesterday." she said and grinned even more.

Deep inside she knew that this situation was an exception, but for she just ignored it for now. It was too good to see that Remus dumped Tonks for her. Well, he doesn't meant it like Rose want it to be, but let her dream a bit. Rose and Remus spend the whole day like they both loved it most: with hot chocolate and lots of stuff to talk about. It was like the world the stopped moving and nothing could touch them in their _own_ little world, where they only mattered and cared for each other.  
>Those days gave both of them a strange feeling of home. The feeling you get when you know someone will be there to welcome you with a smile, a hug and lovely words. The feeling of safety, acceptance and comfort. It was everything Rose and Remus were looking for since they can remember. Everything they needed.<p>

It were days like this, that let Remus frustrate. It was like a dream, it fade away and the cruel reality replaced the perfection after a while.  
>Sometimes it was hard to resist the urge to just tell her everything. He wished he could do it. It would end all the pain that the hopes made... but he was too afraid, the words she could say would hurt more then every hope could make. Let alone that she would probably never talk to him again, and avoid him as much as possible.<br>He couldn't take this. When he avoided her, he could control it.

There was a comfortable silent in the room while they got lost in thoughts. All of a sudden, Rose remembered Sirius' and Hermion's words. _You know, he really likes you... You'll never know if you don't tell him... getting dumped won't kill you... your heart always has a reason why it's this certain person... Tell Remus what you feel..._ These words revolved around in her head and she decided to do something. Probably Sirius and Hermione were right. At least a bit. It was Remus who broke the silence with a deep sigh.

"What?" Rose asked.

"Nothing, I was just thinking."

"About what?" she asked interested.

"About... well... it's very complicated." he said uneasily.

Rose got a bit closer to him until they sat shoulder on shoulder. Yes, those "inadvertent" touches are great to start with.

"I'm here for you." she said and smiled her "shy smile here and there". She thought Sirius would be proud of her if he could see her now.

"I know." he said and lay and arm around her shoulder.

Her heart skipped a beat before it starts to race, that she was scared it would explode every moment. Remus didn't made it better, when he started so play with a flick of her hair.  
>She laid her head on his shoulder and breathed in his scent. Slowly she closed her eyes, just enjoying this moment. Remus buried his face in her hair and kissed it. Her scent made him dizzy.<br>She looked up and looked at his face. It was hard to resist the urge to trace the scars with her finger. How much she just wanted to kiss all the scars all over his body and tell him how beautiful he his, she just wanted to tell him how much she adores him, loves him...

"Remus? I really...like you." she whispered softly.

She doesn't know where that came from, but it felt right to her to tell him this right now.

Remus looked down at her. He shivered slightly when he felt her warm breath against his neck, and now her face way too close to his. Their lips were only a few inches away from each other. So close and he could kiss her. He could finally find out how it feels, to kiss those beautiful red and full lips.  
>He only hardly managed to look in her eyes instead of her lips. Not that it made it any better to look into her emerald green eyes, so full of understanding and love.<p>

"I... like you, too, Rose. I really like you _a lot_." he said and hugged her and buried his face in her neck to don't continue staring at her face.

So many emotions and thoughts run through his mind, he wanted to scream. It was so beautiful and painful at the same time, and mostly it was his fault.  
>He hated himself for don't having the guts to tell her what's going on, for being a werewolf and never having the chance to be hers, for letting himself being in this situation. Maybe Sirius was right, and he should use the chance to get closer to Rose. Well, he mustn't catch her off-guard and tell her everything now. He would start slowly, telling her that he doesn't date Tonks (<em>Merlin, it's about time to clear that!<em>), asking her who this idiot of guy is who dumped her, and then showing her that he... cared. This sounded almost like a quite good plan to him.

Almost. There was only one problem. Tonks herself who just didn't want to accept that he doesn't love her. He couldn't start with his plan while Tonks act like they're as good as together. Rose wouldn't believe him, and he really doesn't want to make Rose doubting his words.  
>The question was: How can you convince someone that you don't love her, when she just doesn't want to listen to you, and thinks she knows that you love her somewhere deep, deep, <em>very<em> deep inside?

He sighed tiredly and start another try.

"Rose... about earlier... I wanted to tell you..." he started but doesn't really know how to start with this topic. No, he has to talk with Tonks first, maybe he could think of a good start in this subject in the meantime.

"How can you convince someone who loves you way too much, that you just don't love her?" he thought aloud.

His thoughts were like a slap in her face, but at least she knew what she wanted to know, now.

"I'm sorry." her voice barely a whisper and stood up to leave.

She made her way out of the room and cursed under her breath. She wasn't mad with Remus, she was mad with herself. How could she be so stupid to listen to Sirius and Hermione? Those tips might help with a little schoolgirl crush, but not when it's about the love your damn life.  
>She closed the bathroom door behind her, when she became aware of the whole horror. Now he knows... She knew that she was terrible at flirting, before, but she wasn't aware that she's so terrible, that Remus would see through her purposes at her first try.<p>

Her heart was racing again, but this time not because of Remus soothing touch but because she started to panicking.

_Keep calm. Just keep calm now! You wanted to know him. Remember Sirius and Hermione words, it won't kill you, and you're prepared what he'll say... but I don't want to hear it. Sirius and Hermione were wrong with... everything!_

She ran her hands roughly over her face, trying to thing rational.

_Well, I can't runaway forever, so... okay, at least..._maybe_, Hermione was right, I know what he'll say, so I should listen, then go to my room and slowly and painfully die on my broken heart._

This was rational enough for Rose. She took a deep breath and slowly made her way back to Remus.

To be honest, the only person who was wrong, was Rose herself. Remus was totally confused about her action, wondering if he said something wrong.  
>He was about to stand up look after his mate, when Rose entered the room with a pale and blank face.<br>Remus walked over to her, lay and arm around her shoulder and walked with her over to the couch. He still got his arm around him when they both sat down.

"What's wrong, Rose? You look terrible!" the werewolf said concerned.

Was he kidding? No, stop that. She didn't want to get mad with him, but she really didn't understand what he was about now. It was obvious that Rose back-stabbed herself with her flirting try, she knew Remus would try to make her slowly but surly and very gently understand, that he was not interested, but actually it annoyed her, she just wanted it to be over.

"Well, the only man I ever loved, doesn't love me and when Voldemort won't step on the gas, I'll die on my broken heart, before he has even a chance to kill me." she answered sarcastically and fought back her tears.

If one thing could confuse Remus more than her leaving, it was this answer. Nevertheless, it was probably his only chance to talk about it without awkwardly starting this topic.

"I know what it feels like." he said sadly and his hand moved in soothing circles on her back.

"You know-" her head shot up. "But you and Tonks..."

"I don't love Tonks. She loves me, yes, but I don't love her. Honestly, how can anyone think we make a good couple?" he said smiling.

"But... the dates... and..." she stammered confused.

"Tonks thinks I'll change my mind, when she annoys the hell out of me." he chuckled.

That took a lot of her mind, she even started to chuckle, too. But wait, he said he knows that feeling...?

* * *

><p>Wow, it's finally up! I'm sorry it took me so long, but I'd real trouble with this capture.<p>

Awesome news for Fem!Harry fans and those who like my fics (lol), I'm already writing the next fem!Harry fic, but I'll upload the first chapter when I'm done with this fic, though. (Yes, it's a lame excuse, which only means _It's the biggest shit I've ever wrote, so I don't upload it until I wrote at least _one_ intelligent sentence._)

And last but not least:

**Sharnorasian Empire -** I actually never read a crossover fic, but I'll take a look at yours. :) And yes, I know, I'll fix this as soon as I release this chapter.

**TheBlackSeaReaper -** I laughed so hard when I read your review, because this were my first thought when I give it a serious consideration to make Sirius an "undercover love-agent". :D

**Lupinesence - **Thanks.I think you can say the same for this chapter. :D

**Nataly SlyPot**- Thanks! :)

**UltimateLoveStorys** - Thanks! :)


	5. Sirius' plan gets serious

_"You know-" her head shot up. "But you and Tonks..."_

_"I don't love Tonks. She loves me, yes, but I don't love her. Honestly, how can anyone think we make a good couple?" he said smiling._

_"But... the dates... and..." she stammered confused._

_"Tonks thinks I'll chance my mind when she's annoying the hell out of me." he chuckled._

_That took a lot of her mind, she even started to chuckle, too. But wait, he said he knows that feeling...?_

* * *

><p>It was slowly getting dark outside and number one person who confuse Rose best, who was actually Rose herself, was send to her room, because the order had a spontaneous meeting.<br>She tried to make some homework (this time for real), to read and to write a letter to Ron and Hermione, but ended up lying in her bed, wondering about the what Remus told her earlier that day.  
>Though she knew that her love-sickness isn't over, yet, she felt better knowing that Tonks wasn't the person Remus has fallen in love with. Still, she wasn't sure what to think about her now.<br>As Remus told her, she knew he didn't love her, but why is she acting like that? Either Remus was lying, though she doubt that, or Tonks was rather ignorant.

_But who cares? Neither Tonks nor I are the ones he loves._

**~ A floor deeper ~**

The order members were scurrying through the kitchen. Sometimes it was so annoying how long they need until everybody sit down and they could start. Today's order chaos was a perfect opportune for Sirius to take Remus aside.

"And?" asked Sirius full of curiosity.

"Well, I didn't really figured something out." Remus said and Sirius already signed annoyed. Does he really had to do everything alone?

"But in my defence, I thought I've more time. Besides this... I honestly don't feel good taking advantage of Rose."

"It's not talking advantage, it's using the best chance you maybe ever have!" replied Sirius frustrated.

"It's not that easy." said Remus. "I just don't know-"

"Are you ready?" asked McGonagall "All members are present now, and we like to begin with the meeting."

The meeting was boring as ever. Sirius told them that the wizards didn't want to choose a side in the war, and were incorruptible. While the other we're discussing what they would do next, Sirius made a plan by himself, only that his plan contain two certain people who were unfortunately to blind to see what happens on front of their eyes.

After the meeting was over, Sirius invited Tonks to stay for supper. Remus shot Sirius a warning glance. He knew Sirius was up to something, but he hoped he invited Tonks because she's his cousin, and not because she was involved in whatever he planned to do.  
>Rose appetite was gone when she heard Tonks voice and saw that she sat next to Remus. Still confused what she should think of her, and how to act around her, she sat down next to Sirius.<p>

"And did I miss something?" asked Sirius directed to Remus and Rose.

"You were only a few hour away." said Rose.

"A few hours where anything could happened." said Sirius as casually as possible.

"Well, Rose and I spend the day together... nothing special happened." said Remus in a undertone of warning.

"Oh, before I forget," said Tonks, "now where Sirius is back, we could spend the rest of the evening together! You agreed to another date as soon as Sirius is back."

"Um... I... not directly, I said-" started Remus but was interrupted by Sirius.

"That's a great idea! So, Rose and I can spend some time together." A victoriously smile brightened his face. Maybe it'll be easier as planned.

"Great! I hope it's okay we won't eat here then and instead go to the three broomsticks, having a wonderful romantically candlelight dinner." her voice crack with ever word a little more.

She grabbed Remus arm and dragged him out of the room before he was able to say something.

Rose stared with a blank face at the table, still hearing Tonks ramble in the hallway. The door fell shut and a single tear escaped her eyes. This time, she doesn't care if Sirius notice.  
>She knew it was very childish but she was pretty angry and jealous of Tonks. Although Remus doesn't love her, doesn't mean she has the right to treat him like that, or even go on a date with him! It wasn't fair at all! Rose loved him since her third year, was always there for him, and had barely the chance to talk to him alone. She doesn't know what's wrong with that woman, but she knew she would never love Remus like Rose would. She would never understand him like Rose did. She just doesn't have any right to date or touch, or only ask him to go out with <em>her Remus<em>!  
>Sirius hugged her tightly. His plan might be drastic, and it'll hurt her, but something has to be done, before they hurt each other any longer. Since he wasn't allowed to talk about it, he planned to tickle the truth out of them. Tonks, who didn't know anything, already help him with his plan. He wanted to talk with Rose in private, and push her in the right direction. After this, he planned to talk to Tonks, and make her understand the truth, before he give Remus a proper talking, how much longer he wanted to waste time like that.<p>

"The guy you're in love with... it's Remus, right?" he asked quiet.

Rose start sobbing against his chest. Her stomach cramped and her heart felt like it was blown up in a million of pieces. She gave up. She was tired up of hiding, of acting like everything was okay, while everything she wanted would never happen. The only thing she could do now, was hoping that Sirius would understand and doesn't hate her.

"Everything will be all right." he said in a hushed voice and drawing circles on her back.

"How can you say that?" she sobbed against his shoulder. "He'll never love me, and he'll hates me when he finds out that I love him! He'll be disgusted and-"

"Merlin, help me." said Sirius under his breath. Sometimes it was amazing how similar they're to each other.

"What?" asked Rose.

"Rose, please take a moment and think about what you said. Do you really think Remus hates you for loving him? He will never hates you. _Never_!"

"But-" she said uncertainty.

"Never. Rose, do you trust me?"

"Of course I trust you, but-"

"Talk to him. Please talk to him about your feelings." he begged.

"I just can't! I... It's hard enough to know he doesn't feel the same, and I already found out he's in love with someone else, so why bother telling him and getting hurt by his words?"

"So you want to give up, before you even try? And if you want to know, yes he is in love, but everything is possible if you try, sweetheart!"

Rose looked at him in disbelieve. Why would he suggest something like this, and risk his godchild got hurt, again. Does he knew something she should know? A moment later the front door bursts open and they could hear Remus shouting at Tonks.

Remus didn't know why Sirius would do this to him, but he knew he'd regret it. As soon as Tonks dragged him out of the house, she started to ramble how perfect they're together, again. The werewolf have had enough. He was sick and tired of Tonks being so stubborn and selfish. Until now, he was just nice and hoped she would understand soon enough he doesn't want anything from her. Apparently he was wrong. Besides this, what does his mate think of him now? Only a few hour ago he told her that he doesn't love Tonks, and now he was going to have a date with her. This wasn't what you call trustworthy.

"Nymphedora." she said quiet but firmly.

"What?" she snapped when hearing her first name. "Don't call me-"

"Just shut up for a moment and listen to what I have to say!"

His were almost glowing golden now, and all blood drained from her face.

"Why don't you understand that I'm _not_ interested in you?" he growled.

"But we're perfect for each-"

"No, we're not! I. Don't. Love. You. How can we be perfect for each other, when I'll never love you? Now excuse me, but I've better plans for today." he turn around and walked back into the house.

"Remus! You can't leave me like this!" she shouted and run after him.

"I can." he said coolly.

"No, you now listen to me, Remus!"

"There's nothing left to say, Dora! Nothing! I told you before, but I like to remind you: I found my mate, I love my mate, and I do not and never will love you!" he shouted.

Remus entered the kitchen and stopped dead on his tracks when he saw Rose's tear-stained face. He almost totally forgot about Tonks and just wanting to know what happened. Rose looked at him, her distressed expression made it hard to control the wolf inside him, who just wanted to sooth his mate. Suddenly a thought hit him. She cried because of him. Because it looks like he was lying, and because he told her he would spend the rest of the day with her, but now leaving her for a date with a person he denied having dates with. He took a deep breath and wanted to explain everything, (and shouting at Sirius for being such an idiot) but Tonks already entered the room. Her face had a dark red shape, and to say she looked very angry was understated.

"Can we talk in private, please?" she said through her teeth, doesn't took her eyes off Remus.

Rose stood up and waited for Sirius to follow, but he didn't moved.

"Actually, no. Remus, Rose, please let me and Dora alone for a moment." he said.

"Sirius-" Tonks started.

"No, I really need to talk to you. Now." he said and closed the door, seeing through the shrinking slit how the soon-couple walked upstairs. Now it was up to him.

"Tonks, it's up to you, either you'll listen to me now, or I'll kick you out of my house." he warned her calmly.

"Why would you say-" Tonks looked at him in surprise.

"Will you listen to me?" he asked, still calm.

"Okay." she said rather annoyed for what his cousin disturbing her discussion with Remus.

"Remus. Doesn't. Love. You. And he never will."

She gasped but before she said something, Sirius continued.

"I really don't know what you're thinking, but when someone says no, you actually leave this person alone. You're obstinate trying shows how much you want him, but you just have to accept he doesn't feel the same."

"But- but I thought you're okay with that." she whispered.

"I'm okay with everybody who's making him happy, but you only annoy him. And me. And, to be honest everybody. And let me tell you, as I told you some weeks ago, I'm okay with you loving Remus, but I'm not okay with you practise upon his good-naturedness. He said no, and that doesn't mean continue dating him, until he gives in. And besides this, I think he already told you that he found his mate I'm sorry Tonks."

"Oh yes? And who is his mate? I never saw him with anybody, and I though werewolfs and theirs mate are inseparable...?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Sirius and Tonks jumped when Severus spoke.

"How did you came in?" asked Sirius surprised.

"What do you mean it's obvious? If you know then tell me!" said Tonks.

"You want to tell me you didn't notice how close Potter and the wolf are?" Snape smiled mischievous.

Tonks look stunned. Was it possible? First Sirius' words and now this. She really didn't know she was such a burden for Remus... well, for everybody. She get him to known last year because of the order, and found him very attractive from the beginning on. A few month ago she started to flirt with him, though he never responded to it. It was Sirius who took her aside, and told her she has to try harder when she wanted the werewolf to understand. And now, the same person was standing in front of her, telling her she was annoying and he would never love her.  
>Yes, Remus denied any feeling for her, still she knew he liked to keep people at distance, scared people would mind his lycanthropy.<br>At some point Sirius were right when he said she would try until he gives in, though not because she was selfish, she just loved him, and eventually he would feel the same. Though one thing was clear, she wouldn't lose him because of a teenager who probably doesn't even knows what love means. She collect herself and rushed through the door. Shortly after she left, Sirius and Severus heard Mrs. Black's voice screaming in anger and disgust.

"That's was almost too easy." said the potion master.

"You have no clue right?" ask Sirius darkly.

"No, but I thought you would like it, isn't it the way you like mischief? Oh and before I forget, I came through the door." were the last words before Severus walked over to the fireplace.

"Bastard!" growled Sirius and run after Tonks, who were already yelling upstairs.

**~ And a floor up again ~**

Rose and Remus didn't talk while walking up the stairs, too absentmindedly about what happened and what would happens next.  
>Rose wanted to go straight to her room, but when she stood in front of the door, Remus grabbed gently her arm. She turned around, only now she noticed his sad and concerned expression.<p>

"May I talk to you? I think I do owe you an explanation." he said.

Rose struggled with herself. Actually she wanted to be alone, and digest what happened today, but the hope that there was an easy explanation for all this, made her nod, and she followed Remus to his room.

"I know what it looks like," said Remus while closing the door behind him. "But believe me, I'm not together with Sory, and I never will. Yes, we dated a few times, but I didn't really want it. And Sirius' knows it, I don't know why he's is doing this."

Tears pooled in her eyes again. She didn't wanted to cry again, but it was all so overwhelming. Why would Sirius kind of force his best friend on a date with someone he doesn't love?

"Just tell me what's going on here!" she pleaded.

Remus sat down next to her on his bed. He wiped away the single tear that escaped her eyes, and wondered how much of the truth he'd tell her.  
>This moment will decide about their everything. Either he'd tell her everything, seeing what will happens, or he'd go on like this, telling her every now and then a little more, but risk that she'll notice he's hiding something and lose her trust forever.<p>

"Rose, do you know what a werewolf's mate is?" he asked carefully.

She closed her eyes for a second, composing herself.

"Snape mentioned it, but I don't know much about it." she said as calm as possible.

"Every werewolf has a mate, I thought mine to be dead, because it's unusually to find a mate after the werewolf's twenties. But it can happen... it happens to me. One day, a werewolf will feel its mate, it's like a pull that brings the him or her to this person.  
>The werewolf will do everything for the mate, because the mate is effectively everything for the werewolf. It's, like humans would say, the love of its life, although it's more literally and more serious. The mate and the werewolf are made for each other, and once the mate is found, the werewolf will stay with its mate, for the rest of its days."<p>

Rose swallowed the lump in her throat, mentally saying goodbye to the chance to ever being his girlfriend.

"And... what does it has to do with..." she nearly choked out.

"Well, actually the werewolf, I, will do everything to make the mate happy, but I only seem to upset her."

He took a deep breath, lifting her chin carefully and looked deep in her sad eyes.

"Rose," he whispered. "you... you're my mate."

She didn't trust her ears, and almost asked him to repeat it. It was like adrenaline run through her body, she felt light-headed, her heart was racing, her palms sweaty, her finger shaking.

"I'm sorry." whispered Remus and looked down at the floor.

"I love you, too." she managed to say.

Remus head shot up, and he felt Rose's lips on his. He hesitated for a moment, but then he pulled her closer and deepen the kiss. His tongue found its way in her mouth and the world around them seems to disappear. He heard a small groan in the back of her throat and felt her pushing herself even more against him. The hands around her waits, he pulled her completely on his lap. Just before his trousers became too small, he broke the kiss. Rose slowly opened her eyes, the love to him was written in it, and feared to get lost in it.

"Are you really sure?" he asked.

"Remus, this is all I want, since I saw you for the first time, on the train! I-"

The door burst open and Tonks started shouting immediately.

* * *

><p>I really start to consider to write a book calling "How to ruin perfect moments". You probably hate me for ruin such a sweet RoseRemus moment again but hey, at least the story made a major step forward. :) I know I'm mean to Tonks, but seriously, can you imagine her giving up so easily? Okay, maybe she would, but that would be boring and doesn't give me another reason to write another chapter. ;)

And now to my lovely reviewers:

**TheBlackSeaReaper -** Confession. Check. Thank you.

**Lupinesence - **Thank you!

**PhoenixLiberation -** Thank you! The space between the paragraphs is a bad habit since another reader complained about it's hard to read with less space. -.- I work on this and the placement of sentences.

**alyssareid -** Thank you!

**candinaru25 -** will happen soon!

**Rori Potter -** Thank you!

**MonsandPads -** Thank you. I'm afraid it won't have many more chapters.


	6. Things get cleared

_"Are you really sure?" he asked._

_"Remus, this is all I want, since I saw you for the first time, on the train! I-"_

_The door burst open and Tonks started shouting immediately.  
><em>

* * *

><p>"<strong>YOU DUMBPED ME FOR A CHILD?<strong>"

"Tonks... what are you doing here?" asked Remus half confused half angry. He couldn't believe this woman ruined another beautiful moment between Rose and him.

"Severus told me-"

Sirius appeared behind her, started to drag her out of the room and growled: "I'm warning you, Dora!" But Tonks jerked her arm out of his grip.  
>"What do you want, Tonks?" Rose asked. She stood up and walked slowly until she was standing in front of the brown haired woman. She couldn't believe how stubborn and ignorant this woman was. Why can't she accept that Remus will never love her? Doesn't she see how annoying she is for everybody and especially 'her love'?<br>"Do you want to force him in a relationship with you? Do you want him to say things he doesn't mean or do you just can't stand the thought that you can't give him what he needs?" Her voice was calm, though you could hear how furious she was with her.

"And can you give him what I can't?" snapped Tonks.

"Patients for example." she hissed back.

If Sirius knew one thing, then how dangerous two mad girl in one room were! "Girls, please!" he tried to gain attention, before they'd say or do things, they regret later.. "Tonks, I'm really sick of your behaviour! Are you blind, stupid or both? Yes, Rose is his mate. And if you didn't knew: Werewolves exclusively love their mates. Even if you were together, he'd dumped you when Rose turned sixteen, so what's the matter of all this fucking shit?" his voice rose with every word.

Tonks face fell. Retrospective she should have known, after all she was a smart woman, who actually knew this simple little fact. Blinded by the obsession over the werewolf, she just ignored everything that stand in the way of her happiness and forgot it. Yes, Remus told her, yes he rejected her before and yes, she should have known. Yet, the innocent wish became an aim, the aim an obsession, the obsession that let her forget the wish. The simple wish to get to know this nice and interesting man. How could she lose control like this? And now Sirius and Rose were even mad with here. Sirius, her favourite cousin, whom she loved like a brother. Rose, the smart and funny girl, she loved like a little sister. All people she loved, were now starring at her, with a rather menacing expression, telling her silently that she wasn't welcome any more. A tear were steaming down her face. "I-I have to go now." she said and left.

Rose, Sirius and Remus watched her going and waited until they heard the front door. Remus laid an arm around her shoulder and gained her attention. She smiled brightly at him. Remus nearly lost control about himself and was about to kiss her again, when Sirius cleared his throat.  
>"Before you two start to pounce on each other... I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!" he said and hugged them both tightly. "You stupid blind brats!" he chuckled against their shoulders. "You're so perfect for each other."<br>"Um. But- wait." said Rose. "You know it all the time?"  
>"Sure." he said and let go of them. "I saw how you looked at Remus last year. First I thought you just adore him but... I saw there was more. And this year, Remus confirmed that you're his mate and-"<br>"But why didn't you said anything?" Rose was shocked. He knew it all the time, but still torture her by making Remus date Tonks?  
>"He made me swear to not tell a soul, and didn't want to listen to me. Listen, I know my plan wasn't the best, and I know some things I made hurt you but... I couldn't tell you, though I couldn't do nothing and just watching how you hurt each other... I'm sorry." he said and tried to sooth his godchild with his best puppy eyes.<br>"I'm sorry too, Rose." said Remus and squeezed her shoulder. "I should have been honest with you. I was just scared that you wouldn't understand, be disgusted and never want to talk to me again. This would be a nightmare. I can't stand the thought of you being angry with me, not to mention leaving me. I need you, so I thought it's still better to be just friends, than losing you forever, just because of this stupid monster-instincts."  
>"It's all right guys." she said and smiled. "I'm not mad with any of you."<br>Sirius kissed her cheek and smiled. "I knew you would understand. Well, I think you have to talk... and stuff... mate stuff... and... I'm downstairs." he said and left the couple. Happy like he wasn't since a long time, he walked down and planned the next step. A party!

"So... um." Rose said, while studying the suddenly pretty interesting floor.  
>Remus cupped her chin in his hand and kissed her softly. "You said something about loving me, since you laid eyes on me for the first time, huh?" he asked, though he couldn't believe it.<br>"Um, well, yes." she admitted and blushed. "I don't know. I think it was only a crush first but... after you left Hogwarts, I couldn't stop thinking about you. I was wondering where you are, what you are doing, how you are feeling. Every full moon I was keep awake almost the whole night, wondering if you're okay. I-" and again she didn't finished the sentence, though this time, it was because Remus kissed her. He pressed his lips firmly against hers, and soon his tough found its way into her mouth. He couldn't control himself any longer, after weeks of depressing thought, she would never love him, he finally found the happiness he was looking for since a life time.  
>"I love you." he whispered against her lips, after they kissed for several mintues.<br>"I love you, too. More than I could love anyone else." and Remus knew, this was true.

**The End.**

* * *

><p>I'm so sorry it took me so long to upload it, and I know you'll be disappointed by this very short chapter, but I'm just so busy lately, and nearly lost the inspiration of this story. I'm really sorry. But I promise you to write a epilogue, as soon as I have the time for it.<br>Again, I want to thank everybody, not only the people who review this story. Thanks for reading, alerting, favour, reviewing and all the sweet messages. You guys are awesome! :)

Forever sorry,  
>Moonys.<p> 


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